Monday, June 6, 2011

White Chip Engineer

I had this text conversation with a friend last week and decided it was funny enough to share:

Him: On the positive side, I finally found the one line code change needed to fix the bug that has stumped me for 3 days. Confirm meh engineer.

Me: Confirm 6/12 engineer. I was like 20/40 break even reg engineer.

Him: Pretty sure my company is proof that conservation of sheen applies to software companies as well. There is google, and there is *****. ***** on lifetime heater, else busto 8 yrs ago.

Me: Confirm busto. Oracle DB has kept that 60K strong pack of 4/8 engineers afloat for 20 years.

Him: I think I forwarded you that link about Oracle maybe buying ***** last year. Stupidity synergy IMO.

Him: Stupidity synergy also explains the winners in Oaks 30 IMO.

Me: Basically the could just fire all of you and just sell the stock and torpedo your product. That was the basic peoplesoft and java plans I think.

Me: LOL I am lifetime winner in Oaks 30, sir.

Him: I cannot complain. I am $86/hr winner since 2007.

Him: Confirm lt heater.

Him: So my current job is to make the LEDs on a bunch of hard disks flash. Pretty sure this is my new all time career low.

Me: Last 3 texts do not compute sir.

Me: Get google job IMO.

Him: Too much political bs at big companies.

Me: Danielle makes goog sound like nirvana. She has zero tolerance for politics. Zero.

Me: Of course she's a white chip engineer.

3 comments:

jesse8888 said...

And as a follow up my friend emailed me:

By the way, technically I am writing the VMM (Visual Mode Manager) which is a glorified way of saying I make the lights flash. It not only controls the lights on the disks, but we also have a 7-segment LED display, ala:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Digital_clock_changing_numbers.jpg

that I control as well. I'm pretty sure I'm going to put in an easter egg to make the display say "F U" on like my 40th birthday or something.

Steve said...

Do you mean "heaven" or like word rather than "nirvana"? Nirvana is a state of being so it is incorrect to liken a place or employer to it.

jesse8888 said...

If I knew which Steve you are I would insult you accordingly, but since I do not and don't want to just lay out four or five insults shotgun style in hopes that I hit you, I can only say...nice hand sir.