Thursday, July 21, 2011

Squeaky, Part 2

First of all if you haven't read part one, you should do that first.

Our last entry found our intrepid hero seated next to almost literally a man on fire, the one and only Squeaky on raging banana tilt from a losing the absolute maximum to Kim's Q3s (for the record that hand is known as the gay waiter, since it is after all just a queen with a I always say if you're not careful, and reading my blog definitely counts as not being careful, you learn something almost every day). A few more hands transpire and the game is just redonkulous as usual, with people 3 betting and capping really with anything that resembles a hand. Players like this can be dangerous, because they've figured out a maxim of limit hold 'em that gets them like 80% of the way to correct play; if you don't want to fold, just raise. The game can be fun, but once a session or so I find myself mis-assessing the ranges and making what turns out to be just a preposterous fold. Sorta like this one, except not so brazen and usually not so funny. The hand goes down like this.

Somebody limps and somebody calls then a raise or a raise then a call I don't really remember and I make it 3 bets with AK and Squeaky just caps it with a great flourish right behind me. John the Asian prop who's been there forever because they pay them so much that he simply can't find a way to get broke tries to show off how tight and good he's playing by folding AQ in the blinds, but obviously fumbles it on the way to the muck (casino employees out there you really should know better than to be such a retarded ass hat and do something like that...just fyi) which is pretty important information. Just how important will become clear in a minute. I don't really remember what the other 15 people in the pot did with their hands, but I know we saw the flop like 4-5 ways and it was:


My hand is even more nut like than usual, since the flashed ace reduces the pairs of aces Squeaky can have from 3 to 1. Assuming his range is even as tight as TT+ and AK, I beat 18 combos, lose to 4, and chop with...a few. So anyway we all check and he bets and someone raises and I 3-bet and he just calls and the other guy calls and now we are only 3 handed and the pot is freaking hunormous and the the dealer digs way way down deep into the deck and turns:


I mean really, ace ball, right up there for everyone to see. The passenger checks, I bet, Squeaky declares "This is the sickest pot I've ever played in my entire life" to which I respond "That's just really hard to believe" and he looks at me kind of funny and says "Oh yeah? I raise!" and splashes chips hither and dither and just fucking every where he pleases (which is hard to believe since it's a 3/6 structure he shouldn't really have that many chips but somehow he's always just splaying them halfway across the table). Our passenger folds and I tank for a second. Normally I'd just call down here, but with the extra ace missing my hand is just so strong, I convince myself that he can actually have AQ (somehow, someway) and after a few seconds put in the 3 bet.

Squeaky immediately berates me. "This isn't TV, this isn't Hollywood! You don't have to make a show for the cameras! I know you have sevens let's just see if I can catch up". As he says this he turns over AK and flings something like 6 chips into the pot. I am stunned and try my best to look it as well as a little sheepish and maybe embarrassed that he has such a good read on me. The river bricks off, I fire a bet, and he...


The instant the dealer has the hand in the muck I of course show my hand and suddenly Squeaky is very, very quiet. He racks up and leaves on his blind, with everyone basically yelling to the floor men "Lock the doors!" as he's on his way to the cage. I didn't partake, however, as I spent the those 6 minutes being very still and trying to avoid making any sudden movements, lest Squeaky just back hand me right upside my face.


Hamking said...


Wacky said...

I've been told that queen three suited is the maitre d, since it's a gay waiter in a suit.

Ken said...

The gay maitre d :-)

I miss occasions like this...dudes folding 1/2 a huge pot for 1 bet closing the action. Too rare indeed.