Tuesday, June 24, 2014


I've actually played a fair bit of poker the last few weeks;  I've found a well of inner energy and strength that I never seemed to have back when it was a job and back when I had so many other responsibilities in my life.  I've banged out several 10+ hour days (weekends) just no problem; they were super low stress innings, so to speak, and I just seemed so much more able to focus, move past beats, and quite frankly play for the most part just super fucking good.  I come down from emotions even more quickly than I did before.  My brain is constantly scanning for ways to be creative, ways to break from the norm.  I am not ever on "victim tilt" where I say "well I am beat but I have to call" and call and lose.  I'm not auto-piloting any hands, I'm not beaten down.  I'm genuinely happy to be in the card room getting a chance to do something that for some reason still does make me feel kind of like a bad ass.  Part of it is the old Tom Sawyer thing;  anything that you have to do is work and anything that you don't have to do is not work.  Part of it is having only played like 900 hours in the past 18 months and only 200 in the past 12.  I'm recharged, in a sense.  Part of it is not having to worry about anything else, not ever getting to the casino having had to compromise about a single fucking thing.  One day a week or two ago I walked in the door at Commerce BEFORE SUNRISE and sat in the most beautiful 1/2 game you've ever seen.  Back when I was with her that could NEVER have happened because we'd have stayed up late or I'd have felt like I couldn't leave or she'd have demanded we have coffee/breakfast saying it doesn't take long not realizing that sometimes that hour really does let you be in a better game ALL day and if you miss it you not only are in a shit box game but you're mad at her for it, but now that I'm single I pretty much just do whatever the fuck I want whenever the fuck I want and it's in many ways quite simply quite awesome.  Like tonight I've watched 2.5 episodes of orange is the new black, posted on two plus two, and ate pretzels with mustard and cottage cheese for dinner.  Yeah, that happened and you know what?  It was fucking fine.  After I'm done writing this post I'll probably go to bed and the entire process will take like 8 minutes from the moment I stand up.  But back to poker...I've just been letting myself trust my instincts and you know what?  Big shocker after close to 10,000 hours of live play they are usually pretty darn good.

I bumped my well on 2p2 and that's gotten some interesting questions.  I'm up over $1000 in donations for the aquathon, and that's great.  And thanks to Nate Silver I have made a lot of money betting on the world cup the past three days.  I had the USA to win or draw, and Brazil, Uruguay and Colombia all to win.  I'm going to lose a weight loss bet, but it is what it is.